My fiance and I planned a very small wedding ceremony with just immediate family. After the ceremony we wanted a reception with everyone there. The guest list to the reception is getting out of hand. We invited about 450 people to the reception. Many of whom live far away and will not attend. We made a list of people likely to show up. It totaled 304 people. We thought since half shows up then it would only be 152 people we should estimate being there. Do you think these estimations are to small? We are so scared that the 304 might show up? My parents cannot afford to pay for all 304 people. It is $45 a person and they stand at the door with a clicker. if you are 10 or more people over they will start charging you for the extra people. This is the bad part. Our first plan was to just have X amount of food and if we run out, we run out. But now, they have this clicker at the door so we will never run out of food. I am freaking out. What should I do? We tried to lower our list and it still seems high. We have so many friends and family members. My mom comes from a family of 12! The other issue is the mother of the groom made a list for me of her family and friends. How can I ask her to lower her list? Should I even go there? I thought wedding planning was suppose to be fun and all I do is stress out. I would offer to help pay but I am paying for everything else besides the reception. My parents keep asking me why his parents do not offer to help. My parents are very non-traditional. They told everyone at their wedding to bring a plate of food instead of a gift. I just do not know what to do anymore. please help me!
You can never guess how many might actually attend so plan on every invited guest to attend. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
It may be best for all of you to read about proper wedding planning. The guest list is not a guessing game. You invite only those you can afford to host. It isn't polite to hope some won't attend. And, it is easy to only invite some.
Parents are no longer financially responsible for their children's weddings. Your parents are being very generous to provide so much. Perhaps it would be best to approach this as if you were spending your own money, because basically you should be. And because parents are not obligated to pay for anything, they do not invite. The mother of the groom may give you a list, but those people do not have to be invited.
Finally, it would have been very impolite to invite guests and not have enough food. We never do this. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
Reception List
