We were married on 07/07/07... on the west coast, pretty much all of our close friends and relatives came.
Now we are having a 2nd wedding on the east coast for the "other" side of the family, which really means... my dad's friends.
Question. Is is appropriate to invite the people that came to the first wedding to the 2nd wedding? Even if I know they can't or don't want to come? It is in my opinion that inviting people that already came is inappropriate and seems like we are trolling for gifts. WE DID send out invites to those that expressed interest in travelling east to the 2nd wedding.
We are getting slack from some people b/c we didn't invite "everybody" again.
HELP!
CC.
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Oct 16, 2007, 3:58 PM
Post #2 of 5
(708 views)
Re: [lks2run262] one marriage, two weddings
[In reply to]
Dear Iks,
There is no way to answer this question, because it is inappropriate to host multiple weddings for a couple who is married. You two are already husband and wife, not bride and groom. There are very many posts here about this exact problem. Just consider if you were invited to someone's wedding who is already married. What would you think? Most guests have stated that they feel that it is a plea for more gifts, the couple doesn't know what is proper, and that they just want to dress up and play. So, it is important to read about what is considered appropriate and consider other's because you are inviting guests. When we invite guests, we are hosts.
Most people who have family in different regions or countries will host multiple receptions. This is considered appropriate. These are not gift giving events, just a way to share the wedding. Most will play a video of the wedding during the receptions.
Please do not do this as it very well could be embarrassing.
Re: [lks2run262] one marriage, two weddings
[In reply to]
Do you mean that you are hosting two receptions - not two weddings? Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
lks2run262
Oct 16, 2007, 4:32 PM
Post #4 of 5
(702 views)
Re: [lks2run262] one marriage, two weddings
[In reply to]
thanks... you just confirmed what I already thought...
the situation is more like this...
when we were married on 07/07/07. it was civil (non-religious) and it included the ceremony and reception...
the one in October (east coast) will be a church blessing and a reception... my father insisted on it and I was ok with it since it was a whole different group of invitees...
but like I stated earlier... we are getting some flack for not inviting people that already came to the first version.
I did not send the invites... but I'm getting harrassed over it, which is why I was looking for some backup!
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Oct 16, 2007, 5:43 PM
Post #5 of 5
(695 views)
Re: [lks2run262] one marriage, two weddings
[In reply to]
A blessing of the marriage is not a wedding and is usually a very informal event. So, you can cut the guest list to those closest to you. Be careful about the planning of the blessing and the party to folow so that it does not appear to be a weddiing.
one marriage, two weddings
