My girlfriend’s mother has offered her original engagement and wedding ring. My girlfriend loves the ring and is completely comfortable with the idea. I have no problem either, except that as I see it, her mother is not really giving the ring to my girlfriend, she is giving it to me to give to my girlfriend. That being the case, it seems to me that I should be buying the ring from her mother, or at least making the offer. Finances are not really part of the equation here. They are perfectly capable of making the gift; I am perfectly capable of offering a fair price. So it is really a matter of what is appropriate. I can’t be the first guy in this predicament. What is proper here? I get along with my girlfriend’s parents very well, but nonetheless I haven’t the slightest idea how to broach this subject.
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Jan 27, 2007, 7:42 PM
Post #2 of 2
(709 views)
Re: [codkcor] Accepting an heirloom engagement/wedding ring
[In reply to]
Dear Codkkcor,
Good question. Actually, it is the first time anyone has ever asked this--refreshing.
It is old tradition that we wouldn't accept a mother's wedding ring as it would mean that we are marrying our fathers. But, this is an old rule and personally I feel that we should put that one to bed. That is just me.
I appreciate your logic. I really hadn't considered this situation as you have and appreciate the fact that it is logical and fair. You are not obligated to offer to pay for it. In fact, her mother may not even notice if you don't. But, it wouldn't hurt to make the offer. To me, it shows that you are considerate, kind, and courteous. Her mother will probably be flattered (hopefully) and tell you that it is a gift.
Accepting an heirloom engagement/wedding ring
