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Married by JP then married again by clergy?

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#1 User is offline   fluffywrenches 

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My fiance & I live in South Carolina but we are getting married Nov. 20th in New Jersey due to illness in my family. We have had no problem changing our plans to get married there, however, every time we turn around we run into a brick wall![pirate] We only have 5 days vacation available to get married (we both work for the same company), we are on a VERY tight budget, therefore we will be driving up & can not afford to take unpaid time off, I will be 7 1/2 months pregnant when we take our vows, and lastly, we are part of a biblical research ministry & are having a HARD time finding clergy to officiate, especially since we want to take a salt covenant. In order to de-stress the whole situation, we wanted to legally get married in our home state, by a judge or justice of peace, & head up to NJ to have a ceremony & reception. Our families feel this is cutting them out of the important part, and we know that the important part is the vows we make to one another before God & our families... Would it be better to leave the "72 business hours" before we want to get married to have it all done in NJ? Or is it legal & acceptable to take care of the paperwork here so we can at least have a one night honeymoon? [crazy]

#2 User is offline   Etiquette Now 

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Dear Wants to De-Stress,

If you get married, you will be married when you go to NJ. Your ceremony will be a vow renewal even though you will be having your marriage blessed by the church. It can appear somewhat as a wedding, but it isn't one.

If you want a 'wedding' ceremony, it would be best to wait until your ceremony in front of your family. You can have your reception in either case.

This can be done inexpensively and proper if planned well. Keep it small and keep looking for the place and clergy. It seems as if being in a biblical research ministry would give you some leads. I'd begin there.

Best wishes,
Rebecca Black, Etiquette By Rebecca

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