[renew]

My husband and I married one another in a private Las Vegas ceremony after only 21 days of knowing one another. We did not tell family or friends until after the fact. This was over 5 years ago. Needless to say, my parents were devastated as I am their only child. They are still very bitter about the lack of a wedding whenever the subject comes up. However, 5 years later, I can honestly say that my husband and I are so happy and our being together was meant to be. God has been so good to us. We have been blessed with two beautiful little boys, who are our absolute pride and joy. We always wanted to have a real wedding, following the original vows; but I became pregnant shortly after our vows with our first son, and our priorities quickly adjusted. We experienced some hard times in the beginning, but we have pulled through them and are stronger than ever today. Regarding a wedding, the only things I truly regret are: not getting to walk with my Daddy down the isle, wear a beautiful dress, or dance our first dance together to our song. I also missed out on the cake, pictures, etc. My husband's family lives in the UK, and my parents are the only family I have besides my husband and two boys...I would like to celebrate our love and the family we've made together, but I don't even know where to start. I would like to "make things right", as our marriage and love for one another deserves it. Thanks for any advice you could give.

[Wedding Queen and MOG]

When you say you want to "make things right", what exactly do you mean? It seems you have everything a couple could wish for. If you are a member of a church, perhaps asking your clergy to guide you in a blessing of your marriage. You could also host a vow renewal, but neither of these ceremonies could bring back the initial moment when the two of you exchanged your vows to be married.

I understand the disappointment your parents must feel, unfortunately, once you are married, there is no magic time machine to go back and recreate that moment. My advice is to host one of the reconfirming ceremonies I listed above and enjoy the happiness with which you have been blessed.

[DennyandKay]

Excellent advice from the site administrator. We all have our share of regrets. You missed out on the wedding but you have had over five years of a wonderful marriage. A vow renewal ceremony can be just as moving as a wedding, although there are fewer bells and whistles. If you wish to have a decorated sheet cake have pictures taken, and dance to "your song" at a celebration party afterwards, go for it. Keep in mind that this get-together should in no way suggest a wedding reception with expensive gifts. That ship has sailed.

Since your parents still feel unhappy about your decision to elope, it would be healing for everyone involved to have a time of seeking, offering, and receiving forgiveness. As you say, God has blessed you and this is one way He can bless your parents through you. We can forgive one another as God forgives us---because the price has been paid by His Son.

May God guide you as you make decisions on your future.

[Etiquette Now]

Agreed. Plus, if you do decide to host some sort of vow renewal, this is not a wedding and shouldn't appear to be one. You two already are married. So, there is no dress, wedding cake, walking down the aisle, or any other wedding related element. It should just be a ceremony to restate your vows to each other. Please read more about vow renewal etiquette. http://www.idotaketw..._etiquette.html