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Inviting one uncle, not the rest?

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#1 User is offline   Courtz 

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Hi

Apologies if there is already a question about this, I have been searching but havent found anything that quite relates.

My partner and I were discussing wedding guest list size, and through that conversation we found we both had very different ideas on invites/guests.

I believe invites should extend to extended family, he doesnt entirely agree.

Situation: my dad ("bride's father") has three other brothers. My dad and one brother (David) are close, but not so much with his other two brothers. I am also close with David, and only really see the other two on occasion when they come visit my parents once in a blue moon (I live with my partner, so they're not visiting me per say) or at family functions.

Would it be improper to invite one uncle, but not the other two? What's the etiquette in this situation (as I know its technically up to us who to invite and/or to invite who we're close to)? My instictual feeling is if one brother is invited, the others have to be as well?

#2 User is offline   Nancy Tucker 

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Hello Courtz, this is a tricky one when it is between siblings. Etiquette says that you invite those close to you but in a situation where damage can be done to a family relationship, I would have to give in and Dad's other two brothers come as well. Who knows as a result of you reaching out to invite them it may create a greater desire for closeness and their niece. Best wishes.
Nancy Tucker

#3 User is offline   Ohio Wedding Planner 

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I absolutely have to agree with Nancy. Since you are inviting one, invite all of them, in order to NOT cause new "issues" between people in the family. While this may not be your favorite option, it will do more good than harm and you will feel better in the long run. There is a good chance that, if they aren't close, they won't come to the wedding so I wouldn't worry too much until you get the RSVP list.
Brandi Hamerstone,
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#4 User is offline   Etiquette Now 

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Great advice! The proper etiquette dictates that we may only invite those who are close. However, as was mentioned, it can cause hurt feelings when one sibling is invited and the others are not. So, I completely agree with all the advice mentioned.
Rebecca Black, Etiquette By Rebecca

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