Do Both Sides of the Family Host Bridal Showers


Do both sides (bride & groom) throw a bridal shower? The brides family is planning on (2) showers, the aunt and grandmother are planning one and the sister and MOB are planning another. My daughter, sister and I were planning on throwing a shower with the groom’s side as a welcoming for the bride. The bride is very upset as she only wants to have 2 showers and would like us to combine with her mother and sister. This would be fine but I feel too many planners could cause issues as the bride’s side is very jealous of what we do and feel it’s there event and their family should plan the event.

Should we just back off and let the brides side take care of this, or should we just host our own? I know traditions have changed over the years but I thought in the past both sides threw separate showers, and being the grooms side, we really have little involvement in the planning or assisting in any of the “Big” days events.

Wedding Planner

In the first place, family members should not host a shower. This is like the family asking guests to bring a gift for their daughter or family member which is not polite. Since you have no control over that, I would cease the thought of a shower for the groom’s side unless they are invited by the bride’s family. That way there will be no overlapping planning issues. Also, only those who will be invited to the wedding should be invited to the shower.

Wedding Queen

I agree with Nancy. Only members of the bridal party or unrelated wedding guests should host a shower. No more than two showers per wedding. You don’t usually see the sides split up like this unless there is a travel/location issue. Hopefully one of the other hosts will consider inviting some of the groom’s family to their shower or, at least, the mother of the groom. She really should be invited to any showers held for the couple.

But, I suppose the question remains…what should you do about all of this information? It’s a sort of complicated question to answer when we don’t really know you or the people involved.

Etiquette Now

Wonderful, perfect advice. I couldn’t have said it better. And, please read our many posts on this subject as it has been covered quite a bit.