[madrigalblue]

We are having a formal renaissance wedding. I am trying to find sensible, plain, two-piece, non-corsety dresses that will look decent on all of the bridesmaids (we really have a big range).

We have not picked out the dresses or the seamstress who will make them yet. My bridesmaids are from different states. In order to avoid problems with fitting, I thought it would be best if I sent the ladies pictures of the dress. I would ask that they are specifically measured by 1-3 designated 'measurerers' (the seamstress, or trusted family members in different states that really know what they're doing when it comes to sewing).

I would then send the measurements in to the seamstress and she would make the dresses. I'm assuming we'd have a fitting and any necessary alterations would be made.

However, I know I'd feel uncomfortable if the bride was skinny and she asked me to hand over my measurements. I am personally average-sized, losing weight, and short, but some of the larger bridesmaids know that the other bridesmaids are a lot thinner than I am.

What is the appropriate way to handle this?

Also, what if a seamstress charges more for a gown that is a plus size? One bridesmaid is very big AND very tall and it would be horrible if hers cost more than the others. I've also read that sometimes due to length of fabric restrictions, dresses can't be made for big & tall women. I'm really hoping to avoid or sidestep these disappointments with my larger bridesmaids.

They all accepted as bridesmaids knowing that it would be a renaissance wedding. I'm not sure if they're just nervous, but some of them are seriously apprehensive about wearing renaissance attire, even though I assured them it won't be costumey or corsety (the smaller busted girls are really uptight about that one).

What is the proper etiquette concerning measurements in this situation?

Also, one of my bridesmaids is pregnant. I'm not worried about offending her as she's quite happy to be a mom again, but when do we take her measurements? She will not be pregnant at the wedding (I think she's 2-3 mos. along and we are getting married next September).

[Etiquette Now]

Dear Bride,

There really is no official etiquette for measuring people or how to handle the measuring. But, it seems as though you are on the right road. Asking each of them to send in their measurements is best. Assure them that no one else will see their measurements.

You won't know about the extra costs, if there is any, until you find a seamstress. So, there is no way of knowing how to deal with this yet. Just look for a seamstress and work from there.

Best wishes,