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This post has been edited by TWQadmin: 22 July 2025 - 09:22 AM
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How does a honeymoon registry work with a bridal shower?
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farrahshe 
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Posted 22 July 2025 - 09:19 AM
Hello! By taking part in this excellent and helpful forum I've learned about honeymoon registries and think it might be appropriate for myself and my fiance! We've lived together for 5 years and have an apartment full of stuff, so there really isn't anything we need. I was discussing the honeymoon registry with my MOH and she thinks its a great idea. However, we're both wondering how this would coincide with my bridal shower, since there would be no actual "gifts" to open. Do we just throw a party without the gift opening or should I be sure to register at a traditional store as well? I don't want to eliminate the shower altogether because it's so traditional and. Help?
#2
Etiquette Now
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Posted 22 July 2025 - 01:14 PM
Dear Registering,
Although the honeymoon registry is fairly common these days, every guest I have heard from does not care for it. I haven't heard anything positive as yet. In fact, couples have informed me that they don't receive many donations to these except from family. So, it is best to know the other side.
Also, it is never appropriate to tell guests what they must give you. So, it is best to register for other items as well.
The shower really isn't as traditional as you may think. The original shower was for a woman whose dowry was denied by her father and the town's people 'showered' the couple with the items they needed to help set up their home.
It later became popular here at the end of WW2 when the men came home with little money to begin a family and home. Families came together to help them set up their homes--mostly small kitchen items.
Today, many women are choosing 'gift-less' showers because the extra flow of gifts are not necessary. The feeling of inclusion and togetherness is what they want.
So, if you are offered a shower (because you can never demand), this should either be a 'gift-less' shower or one where you open gifts to appear appropriate. This should not be a shower where each guest is expected to give you an envelope stating that they have contributed to a fund. This is like asking for money, which is never appropriate.
Best wishes,
Although the honeymoon registry is fairly common these days, every guest I have heard from does not care for it. I haven't heard anything positive as yet. In fact, couples have informed me that they don't receive many donations to these except from family. So, it is best to know the other side.
Also, it is never appropriate to tell guests what they must give you. So, it is best to register for other items as well.
The shower really isn't as traditional as you may think. The original shower was for a woman whose dowry was denied by her father and the town's people 'showered' the couple with the items they needed to help set up their home.
It later became popular here at the end of WW2 when the men came home with little money to begin a family and home. Families came together to help them set up their homes--mostly small kitchen items.
Today, many women are choosing 'gift-less' showers because the extra flow of gifts are not necessary. The feeling of inclusion and togetherness is what they want.
So, if you are offered a shower (because you can never demand), this should either be a 'gift-less' shower or one where you open gifts to appear appropriate. This should not be a shower where each guest is expected to give you an envelope stating that they have contributed to a fund. This is like asking for money, which is never appropriate.
Best wishes,
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