[rmccabe44]

I will be attending a Bridal shower in which the bride and groom are currently in the process of building a new home. The invitation lists the locations of registry; however, all items have been purchased. There is a note on the invitation that indicates that Gift Cards to Home Depot/Lowes are also a great idea. Being a practical person, I would love to go that route, but don't know if it is tacky and/or appropriate. Both the bride and groom I know well and would probably appreciate the gift cards more than fine china. Part 2 of my question: what is an appropriate amount for the gift card? I am good friends (have been for a few years) with both sides.

I appreciate any advice!

This post has been edited by TWQadmin: 31 July 2025 - 08:35 AM

[Etiquette Now]

Dear Rmccabe,

What is tacky is including the wording in the invitation that the couple would appreciate gift cards. This is the same as asking for cash.

Although it is becoming more common to give gift cards for a shower, it really isn't proper. The traditional gift giving shower involves gifts that are to be opened. You could give them something you wish to give that is not on a registry.

The gift-less shower would have been much more proper in this case. It is a bit stomach turning to hear of a couple expecting their guest to assist them with the building of their new home just because they decided to marry.

There is no appropriate amount for any gift. One amount is generous to some and yet lacking to another. If these people expect gift cards, they probably expect their guests to give them a large sum.

Best wishes,