[barbie73]

Please help!! I am planning a wedding for a family friend whose mother recently passed from cancer. She is having her sisters as bridemaids and wants to be given away by both her father and step-father as they were close to each other. She would like to light the candle with her sisters at the beginning of the ceromony, but we are unsure how to go about this. Would it be wrong if the father's guide her to the memorial candle or stop at the end and have her sisters guide her to the candle the return her to the father's to be given to the groom. Please help as this means so much to her along with her sister's. She is already getting married on her mother's birthdate to Remember it as a happy day and to know that her mom will be looking down on them all.

This post has been edited by TWQadmin: 19 September 2025 - 04:33 PM

[RevSusanna]

Here is a suggestion in line with your thinking: Have a memorial candle at the altar/ceremonial table with a small "lighting candle" besides it. Both fathers walk the bride to the end of the chairs/pews. They stop. One sister picks up the candle. The other picks up the small tapered candle. They walk to the bride. One sister holds out the memorial candle while the other hands the sister the lighting candle (or lighting utensil). The bride then lights the memorial candle. The sisters then walk back to the table and place the lit memorial candle in its place of honor with the blown out lighting candle or other lighting utensil next to it. They then go back to their bridesmaid places. Once the sisters are in place, the groom steps forward and the "giving away" process continues. The bride hugs both her fathers. The groom then shakes each of the father's hands. The fathers join the bride and groom's hands. The fathers then take their places in front of their designated seats. The bride and groom step up to the altar/ceremonial table together to stand before their officiant.

Here are added suggestions. The bride may wish to place a special note to her mother sealed in an envelope on the table--next to the candle. A special message to heaven so to speak. She can even say "Happy Birthday". Also, if you are arranging a program, a written tribute to Mom is most appropriate as well. Another thought, you can have a special bouquet of Mom's favorite flowers placed somewhere at the reception, with a card dedicated to her or Mom's photo. It acknowledges Mother's presence at the reception as well.

I hope this helps!

Blessings,

This post has been edited by TWQadmin: 19 September 2025 - 07:53 PM