[bmbivona]

Help! I don't know what to do. I am the bride and I just found out that I am planning my own shower now. My maid of honor is 17 and the only one local. My other 2 sisters live at least 4 hours away and my other bridesmaid lives 10 hours away. I asked my mother if she could help my 17 yr old sis in planning my shower and she said no. She thinks that because my finacee and I bought a house 5 months before the wedding (we did not live together before that) I don't deserve a shower.

What do I do? Am I to have a shower? How horrible is it for me to throw it? HELP ! (this is my 1st marriage)

[Wedding Queen and MOG]

A bridal shower is an optional event which someone must offer to host. You shouldn't be involved in the planning at all, other than to provide a suggested guest list and date that you can be available.

You'll have to wait for someone to offer to host this for you. Family, other than the women in your bridal party, should not host.

If you'd like to host a pre-wedding party consider a bridal tea or luncheon where you treat the ladies to a meal and toast their friendship and devotion to your wedding planning. Note that this is not a gift giving event.

[Etiquette Now]

I completely agree. The most important reason for having a shower is for the interaction. So, hosting a party like those mentioned is a great alternative.

[Weddings by Shayna]

While it's tough to accept, it's true. You can't throw your own shower. Do feel free to throw any of the other events previously mentioned - and you never know who will offer to throw you a shower once they figure out that your bridesmaids aren't arranging one.