[lavesa]

I got engaged May 07 and my wedding is June 08 which gave me plenty of time to plan. I had already planned to hire a professional planner but my Matron of Honor's assistant called and begged me to allow her to help. I agreed because she said that she would be at my beck and call and that she would not charge me anything(she is trying to make this a second career and this would be her 1st wedding). We decided to pay her anyway because I'm very picky and we didn't want her to deal with alot for no money. We are paying her a total of $1000. At first she set up alot of appts. and had several meetings with me but lately she has been lazy and my florist/decorator had to step in and give me a list of things to do so that everything will come together.(The wedding is 3 months away and there were a million things not done) I am pretty much taking care of everything and I'm keeping her because she has been there and I need her staff for the wedding day; however this past weekend I attended a bridal shower where I was introduced to a planner that was awesome. She is doing everything for the bride and she attends church with me. My planner has never even met my wedding party. I think she thinks that maybe its my job to coordinate the wedding party and much more. What should I do? The other planner is available but I don't want to hurt anyone.

[Etiquette Now]

Dear Lavesa,

Since you are paying the first woman and you are not happy, it is appropriate to go with someone whom you trust more. If your planner wants this to be a career, then this is a good lesson.

It may be helpful for her to know exactly why you are replacing her.

Best wishes,

[lavesa]

Thanks. I was also wondering whether or not it was her job coordinate the wedding party, go to the appts., and calling to make certain appts. Is it my responsibility to take care of these things? Am I not paying her enough?

[Etiquette Now]

That is definitely not my area. But, I do know that you can set up a different level of service with planners.