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Our reception will start at 6pm. Everyone and everything must be out by 11pm, so we will have to guide the partying to wind down no later than 10 so vendors can get all their stuff cleaned up and out, etc. We know that many of our friends will by no means be ready to call it a night this early, though, and neither will we!
The idea as of now is to rent a hotel suite for the night and invite some of our closer friends to come back there with us after the reception to continue the party. I've been wondering whether I should include an additional note about this in the invitations of the people who we'd invite to that, or just spread the info by word-of-mouth? The main reason I'd want to let them know details formally and in advance is that I'd love to arrange a car service to take us and any of those who would plan to come back with us from the reception site to the hotel. But to coordinate that properly (and hopefully avoid some drunken driving), we'd need to have those select guests actually come to the hotel before the reception and be driven to the reception site so that when they come back that night to party at the hotel with us, their cars are already there. Make sense? The more I ponder all these details though, the more I wonder if I'm just making it way more complicated than it needs to be.
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inviting only certain guests to an after-party
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Posted 25 April 2025 - 04:33 PM
Dear Mojoar,
Typically the idea of an after-party for just a chosen few isn't polite or fair. All wedding guests should be invited to the 'entire' reception. But, in your case this seems proper, as you are not going out to another party or really hosting another (large) party. It just appears that you want to spend some quality time with those with whom you are really close after your reception. However, it could still appear as if those who aren't chosen, are not on your 'A' list of friends. So, it may be best to speak to your friends about this, let them know that it is a private affair, informing them of all your plans, and ask them to let you know if they are interested. Email is fine for this as well.
Best wishes,
Typically the idea of an after-party for just a chosen few isn't polite or fair. All wedding guests should be invited to the 'entire' reception. But, in your case this seems proper, as you are not going out to another party or really hosting another (large) party. It just appears that you want to spend some quality time with those with whom you are really close after your reception. However, it could still appear as if those who aren't chosen, are not on your 'A' list of friends. So, it may be best to speak to your friends about this, let them know that it is a private affair, informing them of all your plans, and ask them to let you know if they are interested. Email is fine for this as well.
Best wishes,
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