[Marymo]

Hi! My husband has a small photography business as a side job. He has been hired by an acquaintance (someone he has done other photography work for) to shoot their wedding. I have met this couple only a handful of times in a large social setting, so I was quite surprised when we received an invitation to the wedding - as I, myself, never expected to be invited. Since I really do not know them, I am sure that I was just invited as a courtesy, since my husband will be there.

I will NOT be attending, but obviously my husband will be there as he is taking the photographs. So, my question is two-fold. When we send in the response card, I assume I will just check that ONE will be attending, and make his dinner choice, and my second question is, since he has been hired for the wedding, and I am not attending, would it be proper to give a gift or not, and if we just wanted to send a little something to celebrate their love and special day, what would be appropriate? Understand that I know nothing about this couple...if they have registered, if they own or rent a home, what their taste/style is, etc. I was thinking of sending a gift certificate to OUR favorite restaurant, so when the hecticness of the wedding and honeymoon are over, they can enjoy a nice meal out.

Thanks!

[Etiquette Now]

Dear Marymo,

A gift would be appropriate because the couple were not obligated to host your husband since he is paid to be there. It was gracious of the couple to include you two. The gift certificate to a restaurant is a good idea.

Best wishes,