[paperslave]

I am planning a wedding in my area, but all of my family and most of the groom's family does not live in the area. I want to rent a Cabin that sleeps 20 adults so we can spend two nights together (or three if they arrive the night before). The cabin will cost about $2000 and I will provide 2 breakfasts & 2 dinners.

Since the bride and groom do not normally pay for lodging, I wanted to ask for everyone to contribute toward the food and lodging expense. I am getting married in a tourist town so lodging can be expensive. I was thinking $200 per couple total would be fair, but I can't think of any way to state this tactfully, and I am very uncomfortable asking for money. I need advice on what to do and how to handle this.

This post has been edited by TWQadmin: 02 February 2026 - 05:52 PM

[Etiquette Now]

Dear Paperslave,

This is tricky because if you invite, you pay. And, there is no polite way to ask for money when you invite guests to an event, whatever the event is. So, this would have to be an option for your guests. You could list lodging alternatives on an enclosure in your invitations with a contact number. The contact person would be charged with collecting the names of those choosing the cabin. It would not be appropriate for you to be involved with asking for cash to rent it.

So, you have the choice of renting it and hoping your guests pay to stay through an agent, or not renting the cabin and allowing your guests to find their own lodging.

You are obligated to pay for your attendant's lodging for at least two nights.

Best wishes,