[robbiemay]

My son is getting married for the 2nd time. As parents of the groom, my husband and I offered a rehearsal dinner. Wedding party is big so 50 people will be attending out of town. Bride to be and mother of the groom want to make the arrangements and have control, but not to pay for it. I feel it is a gift and not an entitlement. Has caused trouble with son who just wants to please his future wife and in-laws because I have expressed my opinions as stated. Don't mind suggestions, but feel mother of groom is stepping over boundaries and future daughter-in-law is ungrateful and controlling. How should I handle this?

This post has been edited by TWQadmin: 27 July 2025 - 11:01 AM

[Wedding Queen and MOG]

It's your event to host as you see fit. It's nice of you to consider their feelings and the feelings of the wedding couple, but if they are asking you to do things you're not comfortable with or can't afford then perhaps your son needs to step up and deal with his bride. Have him explain that this is your event to plan and that he knows you'll do an excellent job, just as you are sure they will do an excellent job planning her son's wedding. Maybe offer to allow them to have some sort of say on specific items, maybe giving them a choice of a few menu items. If she still insists on running the show he can gently explain that they can pay and she can have al of the control.

Also, that seems like a lot of people for a rehearsal dinner. Only those actually needing to rehearse and their significant others are usually invited. Sometimes some out of town guests are included if there aren't to many of them. Use your judgment.