[dltldj09]

I have read several other posts, but none address my particular question. My daughter is having what she describes as an informal outdoor wedding at a botanical garden. Neither the groom or his groomsmen will be wearing tuxes. They are wearing black slacks, white shirts and royal blue ties. She and her groom think boutonnieres would make their attire look too formal. I don't see a problem with the groomsmen not wearing one, but I wish the groom would wear one to set him apart from his attendants. I don't think I'm going to be able to talk them into it (after all it IS their wedding, and I'm trying to be cooperative). However, my question is, if the groom is not going to wear a boutonniere, should we still provide corsages for the mothers and grandmothers, and boutonnieres for the fathers and grandfathers? (I might add, even though she says the wedding is informal, the botanical setting is making it quite elegant). You can tell this is the first wedding I have planned (and God-willing, the only), and I want to get it right. Thanks for your help.

[Nancy Tucker]

Flowers are a recognition and honor. For an informal wedding with no jackets, I would say they are correct; the boutonnieres would not look appropriate. If they want to give corsages, etc. to the parents and grandparents, that is perfectly okay but not a must.

[Etiquette Now]

I agree. And, it is their wedding; they should have the last say.