Top Wedding Questions: Where do I fit? - Top Wedding Questions

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Where do I fit?

#1 User is offline   whatsright 

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Posted 29 October 2025 - 01:30 PM

My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. Living together for a year and half. Recently his daughter got married. Per her request, I was involved in the planning, etc. (personal att) I also hosted her shower because she asked me to. The wedding though was very different. I was no longer considered. According to the bride, I was supposed to sit 2 rows behind my boyfriend. While he sat in the front row, just him and his ex wife. I was really hurt that I couldn't experience this by his side. I also was not asked to be in not one picture. I really felt like I was just someone to do all the grunt work.
I told my boyfriend how I felt. He of course didn't think of most of it. He did say he wished I would have been sitting with him.
Am I in the wrong here? No, we are not married, but have been together and are serious. Should I let it go, or say something to bride? I took it very personal. She says she loves me and how great her dad and I are together. But the one time her actions could have backed that, they didn't.

#2   Wedding Queen and MOG 

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Posted 29 October 2025 - 05:47 PM

I don't think this is a wedding rehearsal question but I'll respond anyway.

I'm not sure what you'll accomplish by bringing this up to the bride now. If it were me, I'd let it go and move on. Perhaps she didn't know that what she did was hurtful. She may have received some bad etiquette advice. If she says she loves you, and acts as though she does, then forget it and carry on. However, in the future, try to be gently honest about your feelings before things get out of hand.

I hope all of you can get past that small indiscretion and have some nice memories of the wedding.

#3 User is offline   Etiquette Now 

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Posted 30 October 2025 - 09:48 AM

I completely agree. There is a lot of family pressure during these times. And, so few people actually know what is proper and tend to make it up as they go. So she really could have thought she was doing the right thing.

It is sad and unfortunate. But, it really is best to let it go.

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