[rsmith5287]

I've been reading the posts here for a while, and hope you might be able to answer a question that is pretty similar to others on here. I'm getting married this June. We're having a Jewish wedding in NYC (rabbi, family-quilted chuppah, seven wedding blessings, bedeken, the whole thing...)

I have an almost five-year-old cousin that my fiancee & I are very close with, and my fiance has an almost three-year-old nephew. We want both boys in the wedding, but we're having trouble with what we want them to do. I'm a preschool teacher and just have trouble with the idea of asking kids so young to walk down the aisle & "behave" so well. I'd loved the idea of ringing bells & yelling "the bride is coming," but on further conversation realized this wouldn't work for two reasons. 1- Our wedding (and we) are Jewish; wedding bells + Jewish wedding don't really make sense. 2- Bells + little boys during quiet ceremony = trouble.

So... the only ideas I've liked for our relatively formal (all in a catering hall), traditional ceremony, is holding signs. How would that work? What would they be made of? What about the whole wedding party carrying signs rather than flowers?

OR do any of you have ideas for what boys this age might be asked to do in the wedding we've described?

Sorry for the length of this & thank you in advance!

[Etiquette Now]

Dear Rsmith,

I can't imagine the sign aspect of all of this (a sign that reads: bouquet or ring?). I honestly think that might be difficult for your guests to understand. And, I agree that the boys are young, especially the youngest (much too young). So, it might be best for them to just watch, unless you want someone to walk with them down the aisle with the pillows.

Best wishes,