[OhioMom]

My daughter is a flower girl in her Godmother's wedding, out of state. I found out last night (from the brides' mother) that our 4 year old son is not welcome at the event b/c the bride and groom have decided to host an "Adult only" wedding. I was told that I either have to leave our son at home for 3 days for the duration or I could "use" the sitters they have lined up at the hotel on the day and night of the actually ceremony. The sitters are 2 nine year old girls! My husband is outraged and wants to pull our daughter from the wedding. I am upset and angry. Feedback please.

[Wedding Queen and MOG]

When a couple plans an adult only wedding, then that should include adults only in the bridal party as well since everyone in the bridal party should be invited to the reception. It's very hurtful to include one child from the same family and not another. Hurtful to the child and the parents.

I assume you're close with the bride since she is your child's Godparent, so please give her a call and calmly explain that when you accepted this role on behalf of your daughter you assume the entire family would be welcome since your daughter was already invited. If she cannot understand your position, then maybe it's better to let her know that you cannot allow one child to participate and leave the other out. Plus, you may want to be sure your daughter is welcome at the reception. If not, then you would need to decide if you will attend without the children, leaving them back home with family, friends or sitter, attend and allow your daughter to participate, and then what you will do with your son. Please talk this all out with your husband so the situation doesn't get volatile and you don't mess up the relationship with the bride.

[Etiquette Now]

Great advice! I completely agree.