[cristina2]

Hi,

I was wondering if I must have missed where this was in the posts, and was wondering how to handle a "guests feel compelled to give gifts at 2nd reception".

I'm having a destination wedding. We are not having a bridal shower. I believe we may register for gifts someplace. Since we won't be having a bridal shower, we obviously won't be sending the "gift" info to anyone except the Maid of Honor and my parents so that if guests ask either my parents or the Maid of Honor, then they can provide a suggestion. Based on my understanding of the posts here, I believe this is etiquettly correct.

For the 2nd reception at home, I believe it is inappropriate for us to still be registered at all at that time, since it is not a gift-giving event. My immediete family and friends argued with me that I should have a registry so that people will know what to get. I keep stating this is not a gift-giving event, thus, guests are free to do what they like.

Should I:
1) maintain the registry for the 2nd reception or take it down?
2) advise the Maid of Honor that if guests feel compelled, that they may provide cash or a donation to a charity that we care about?

How should I handle the 2nd reception for those guests who feel compelled to give a gift? I definitely do not want to offend those who do not, since it is not a gift-giving event, and the wedding will be done!

-Etiquettly concerned bride

[Wedding Queen and MOG]

It's fine to be registered. However, you would only inform those who specifically ask. Tell friends and family members where you're registered so they can answer, if asked.

Be reminded that the wedding guests are the only guests obliged to give/send a gift. The reception guests are not.

[Etiquette Now]

Well put. The registry is fine. Many leave this up for a while for those who are sending late gifts.