[Lenanana]

My son and daughter in law are insisting on a cash bar at their wedding even though my husband and I have offered to pay the bar bill. The bride's parents are paying for the reception and we do not want to offend them. They want alcohol at the reception but think the guests should pay for it. How can we tactfully pay for our guests' drinks?

[Etiquette Now]

Dear Lenanana,

I don't think there is anything you can do to pay for their drinks if the couple has refused to accept your offer. It would be somewhat like going behind their back. I believe the only other option would be to suggest they read about how this is very poor manners. It is mentioned in all etiquette books that mention weddings. They will be viewed poorly if they do this.

Best wishes,

[Wedding Queen and MOG]

I agree with Rebecca. I'm stumped about why they'd think their GUEST should pay for anything. Maybe remind them that if they were inviting these people to their home they wouldn't expect their guests to pay for a drink in their own home so why would they expect them to pay somewhere else? Doesn't make sense. We'd be happy to set them straight if you send them here. ;)