Top Wedding Questions: Can I ask people to invite themselves to my reception? - Top Wedding Questions

We are planning a destination wedding with immediate family only, followed by a full reception when we return home. I am planning to put an engagement announcement in the newspaper in the small town I am from (my parents still live there). It's the kind of place where everyone knows everyone, etc. I would like to invite lots of people in town to the reception (church people, former teachers, etc.), but I'm not sure where to draw the line and who would even be interested in attending. Is it appropriate to say something in the announcement printed in the paper like, "X and Y will be married on Z island in June and will be holding a reception for friends and family on July 3rd. If you would like to request an invitation to the reception, please email [email protected] or call ###-###-#### with your mailing address."??? Is it even appropriate to ask people to "invite themselves" if interested? If so, how do you recommend wording the announcement in the paper? Thanks for your help!

This post has been edited by TWQadmin: 09 June 2025 - 07:38 AM

Although you want to include as many people as possible that would enjoy celebrating your marriage at your post-wedding reception, I would refrain from including any "invite yourself" wording in your engagement announcement or reception invitation. Instead, you should try to include as many people as you can from your town, friends, family, etc. when mailing the invitations for your post-wedding reception. You may also ask your close family to spread the word, just via word of mouth that all family and friends are welcome to attend, however, I would caution you about making sure that you are prepared for the possible number of guests that may show up. Best of luck with your wedding and reception!

I agree. Great advice. It really isn't appropriate to expect others to invite themselves, especially to request an invitation. The host invites. Plus, a good host would want to offer her guests refreshments. This wouldn't be an easy task if you don't know exactly how many would come, as the notice in the paper just might appear as an "open invitation" to all who know you and they might not contact you before they arrive.

It is best to follow good old fashion etiquette and logic here and issue invitation to those you want to attend.

Also, please remember that this is not a gift giving event and no mention of gifts should be made.

Best wishes,